[TW Sexual Abuse, CSA]
I once had an older guy (my cousin) molest me and tell me that he “couldn’t help” himself because I was such a tease and I was a freak if I didn’t enjoy it. I was ten and he was a teenager. I’m not sure if it’s where my self-loathing comes from but it does plague me. I haven’t done more than kissing with men since, I want to, but it gives me panic attacks.
(submitted by anonymous)
If you think that the nice guy ranting only happens on the internet, you’ve never had to deal with your thoroughly drunken friend shouting about how no girls would go out with a nice guy like him, even though he’s surrounded by single women he ignores because they aren’t attractive enough for him.
If you think guys getting pissy and escalating matters because you told people to stop making sex jokes is a feature of the internet, well, you’ve never asked anyone to stop making jokes that make you uncomfortable.
If you think that inappropriate comments and requests for sex are an internet thing, you’ve never tried to stop a coworker or boss from hitting on you repeatedly, or a head of security, or the guy at the convenience store across the street.
If you think that being shouted at and asked to show people your tits just because you present as a woman only happens in chat rooms and online games, you’ve never walked past a frat house, or, unfortunately, through the main thoroughfares of either university I’ve attended.
If you think unasked for commentary on a woman’s looks only happens because girls post pictures on internet forums (which probably means they’re asking for it), you’ve never been at a bus stop, or the city square, or a mall, or… well, anywhere, really.
If you think insecure men trying to drive women out of activism only happens in online male-dominated communities, you’ve never paid attention politics. Or Fox. Or CNN, sadly.
If you think the reaction to rape victims is bad on twitter, try sharing that experience in person. Or try even standing up for a rape victim. Count how many minutes until someone points out “but men can be falsely accused! The woman just changed her mind! You just can’t believe those drunk *insert varying level of insulting reference to gender*!”
I want to buy a bus, so people can throw shits like that guy under my bus while I drive over them…repeatedly. (on my off days, I’d run over Cubs fans)
I need feminism because
I took a chance and went to a bar tonight to enjoy some music, and within the following two hours these things happened: 1. Had an old man put his hand up my leg and ask if my pubes were straight or curly 2. Was told by a close friend that my opinion on objectification (which is obviously very negative) doesn’t matter because I’m 24 and still get hit on because of my youth (she is 48) 3. Was told by said close friend’s husband that he believes men are genetically programmed to protect women. 4. And was subsequently treated like a social pariah because of incidents 3 and 4 (and refusing to back down in spite of them) by people I thought I respected. Moral of the story? Never go to bars, and being a feminist (aka not a dick) is never easy. Fuck.
When you discuss the wage gap, here are a few things to keep in mind:
- Only white women make $0.77 to a man’s dollar.
- Black women make about $0.68 to a man’s dollar.
- Latina women make about $0.58 to a man’s dollar.
Any stats on Asian women? Just curious…cause I am one, and there’s A LOT of us.
according to aauw.org asian women make 77% to a man’s dollar.
And people laugh when I tell them women are still invisible in this world.
Things I did not know, but should.
This is a post that might save a life.
My mom worked for 25 years as an ER nurse and is convinced that a lot of women die simply because folks only know heart attack symptoms that occur in males.
Not to mention the stereotype of heart disease as a “men’s” condition. Women don’t have hearts!
But if you show a womans bare breasts on TV who knows what could happen!
Cats will live with dogs
MOOSE WILL RAIN FROM THE SKY
And lions will give birth to the terrible many headed hydra O.O
Misogyny kills.(via deadladyofclowntown)
Black Woman? Want A Job? Register On Monster.com As A White Woman
I just read an article about a Black woman named Yolanda Spivey who simply changed her race to “White” (and changed her name to “Bianca White”) on Monster.com and had an interesting (albeit predictable, at least to other Black women and Black men) result:
At the end of my little experiment, (which lasted a week), Bianca White had received nine phone calls—I received none. Bianca had received a total of seven emails, while I’d only received two, which again happen to have been the same emails Bianca received. Let me also point out that one of the emails that contacted Bianca for a job wanted her to relocate to a different state, all expenses paid, should she be willing to make that commitment. In the end, a total of twenty-four employers looked at Bianca’s resume while only ten looked at mines.
Keep in mind that all of the important information (except name and race) on both resumes were the same. I know her experience is truth. How? Because I did a similar experiment before. More than once, actually. It’s rather comical in how grotesque the result is. Apparently, being White and extroverted makes me damn near orgasmic to employers. Being Black and introverted makes me a social albatross for their company.
Human resources (and honestly, “casting director” in Hollywood…think of the correlations and implications therein) is predominantly staffed by White women. This is statistical fact. They are the gatekeepers. They choose who they want and who they like. As Spivey mentioned:Other than being chronically out of work, I embarked on this little experiment because of a young woman I met while I was in school. She was a twenty-two-year-old Caucasian woman who, like myself, was about to graduate. She was so excited about a job she had just gotten with a well-known sporting franchise. She had no prior work experience and had applied for a clerical position, but was offered a higher post as an executive manager making close to six figures. I was curious to know how she’d been able to land such a position. She was candid in telling me that the human resource person who’d hired her just “liked” her and told her that she deserved to be in a higher position. The HR person was also Caucasian.
Been there. I have over a decade of watching and experiencing this. I’ve mentioned similar tales before about how I was perceived in a corporate office because I am a Black introvert, how my wages faired when compared to White men and similar experiences.
I don’t know why this is a shock to any Black person in America.
White folks? Well, they’re shocked that we can speak clearly, so…
Melissa McEwan, of course, on the terrible bargain. My life as a woman, as a queer person, as a fat person, is not your thought experiment. (via sanitywatchers)
Fucking this. This. This. This. “Why are you yelling?” BECAUSE IT’S MY LIFE. AND YOUR WAY OF THINKING MAKES ME WONDER IF YOU EVEN SEE ME AS HUMAN.
“Can I just play devil’s advocate here for a second-” “NO YOU FUCKING CAN’T.”(via deadladyofclowntown)
from the tumblr inbox: why men’s problem is actually men
So, maybe it’s because I use missing-e or maybe I’m completely daft (short money on the latter), but suddenly my tumblr inbox is filled with fuckwits from days of yore. Thankfully, I didn’t see or respond to this piker. Now, I have the whole chain to display.
This is the kind of shit that women / queer bloggers have to deal with every fucking day because “not cis-het penis”.
Exhibit A: this shitbird that demonstrates the (transparent to everyone but himself) toxic cocktail of
- rape culture
- “male” identity
- “white” identity
- and plain, old-fashioned creepy fuckwit
Watch this dipshit vacillate between a shitty disguise and naked aggression:
(note: ever notice how racists always boil down to “stop talking about white people!!!!”)
These low-rent motherfuckers are as complex as a 3rd grade fart joke. They spend their whole lives in rape, hatred and ignorance and are genuinely surprised that nobody believes them. They complain about how men are treated, disadvantaged and so on.
The truth is that fuckwit rapists are the rule rather than the exception and until men end rape, rapists will be regarded as rapists no matter how many 3rd grade disguises are attempted.
(p.s. - to any real 3rd graders out there, I apologize. these fuckwits have nothing to do with you. you’re a lot smarter than they are. they just stopped listening at your age.)